10 Ways to Help Your Child to Cope with Divorce

Some of the ways that many of you have already tried or that others may suggest in an effort to assist your child to handle divorce includes:

1. Make Efforts to Remain Close to Your Child

If a child feels that nobody cares about him/her or that the other person does not find him/her worthy of their time, they pull out. Your child yearns for both parents in his/her life and wishes for the family to be reunited. The message here is, there is no better time than today to make sure your child knows how much you love them. Schedule an hour or two per day for creative or recreational things or just time alone with your child.

2. Work Hard to Co-Parent

Whenever you argue especially concerning a child, they feel as though you’re right to be upset and they have upset you because of something they have done wrong. This leads to either guilt or depressive symptoms. Try not to draw your child into a dispute by talking about things that you are upset about while your child is with you. Avoid talking to the child and instead address those matters of concern with the other parent directly.

3. Avoid Criticizing the Other Parent or The Time That Your Child Spends with The Other Parent

Inculcate in your child to spend time with the other parent and new stepparent or other familial members (if the opposite parent has moved to have a new companion or has remarried).

4. Avoid Uttering Complaints About the Other Parent

Avoid to pass any bad comment that casts them in a bad light. And if you are talking worse about the other parent, then this pushes a child into choosing a side and agreeing with you. Do not complain or bare your teeth at the other parent.

5. Communicate Honestly

Although kids should not feel like they are being told lies, they should be told the truth why you are getting a divorce but in simple ways that they could understand. Be conscious in executing this idea and transmit information thoughtfully. If it is at all possible, try explaining this to the child with both of you in the same room. Inform the child about the necessity of alterations in living arrangements, activities, school timetable, etc., to be made in the near future.

6. Emotionally Available

This means that parents should ensure that they allow their child to feel and show any emotion when the need arises. One must consider the feelings given by the child. Persuade them to be selfish and admit the things that they are feeling. Discussions about divorce may be a continuous phenomenon, or can be at any rate frequent, which may in turn influence some attitudinal changes, at least temporarily. They should inform them they have no blame in the divorce process. But what all of these means is that they are perfectly okay to say that they are angry, resentful, depressed or anxious. This should go on for a while and then reduce gradually as time goes on.

7. Assure Them That There Will Be a Ray of Sunshine in It

Change is hard. Comfort them stating that though certain alterations in working and social calendar and schedule will occur, they will be able to get back to a new normal. Yes, teaching mindfulness can even foster a new kind of connection or relationship between you and your child.

8. Keep Routines Intact

Establish consistency and structure. This means that while some aspects of their life are transforming, at least they can count on having some structure in their lives to cling to. But do not allow them become rebels/affecting the rule and regulation or neglect their chores/responsibilities.

9. Take Care of Yourself

If appropriate, take time for yourself, and for some, this might mean a brief rest or nap. Review your conditions and discover how to productively manage your stress in the form of exercising, eating proper, communicating with friends, or writing a diary. If you prefer not to be physically present in the hospital, you can still support your spouse in various ways including joining support groups.

10. Consider Counseling

If your child is really troubled at the divorce, then it would wise to consult a child specialist. Counselors or therapists can help you and your child reimburse faith and outline a set of expectations you both can work toward.
If you wish to explore the option of seeing a professional divorce lawyer, discuss with your child’s pediatrician and find out if they can recommend a counselor for your child. This will assist to enhance their capacity to have social, emotional and spiritual health.